My post-baby body: One year on

post baby body

How do I feel about my post-baby body? In January 2013 I had a body I was super proud of. I was a size 6/8 which was small but I was used to it. I just couldn’t put on weight. I’m on the slightly shorter side of average. I’ve never been blessed with decent boobs. I’m a firm member of the itty bitty titty committee. Throughout my teenage years, I had convinced myself boys would never fancy me because I essentially looked like an ironing board- entirely shapeless. I spent many years coming to terms with my slender figure and eventually learning to love it. 

Then in November 2013, I fell pregnant and things began to change dramatically. What started with a tiny cute bump turned in to wobbly thighs, a big bum and more stripes on my belly than all of the zebra crossings in my local town altogether.

After I had Holly in August 2014 my flat stomach returned after about 2 weeks. Everyone remarked on how I managed to harbour a 7lb 2 oz baby in my tiny frame. I was a little chunkier than before, and I’d never be able to fit in a size 6 again – My teeny hips were obliterated by pushing a baby out my foof. But I was for the most part happy.

Then September 2017 happened. We welcomed baby Harry. Harry at 7lb 8oz and 9 days overdue had a big strain on my body. Now I had more stripes on my belly, thighs and bum than Britain’s zebra crossings in their entirety. But it’d just go back to normal like last time right?

Wrong. I am now almost 1 year post-partum and my body is its new shape. I must admit to feeling a bit gelatinous. Everything wobbles a bit. I’m now a size 10. Although my size doesn’t define me, and a size 10 isn’t big… It still feels like quite a difference for me and a big change for me to adjust to. I seem to go up a dress size with every pregnancy.

It’s easy to sometimes get depressed about my new shape. I mean, if I was going to put on weight – couldn’t it at least be on my boobs as well so I look a little more proportionate? When I sit, my empty mum-tum hangs over my jeans slightly. 

post baby body

Pictured – Bloated after dinner belly complete with stretch marks. 

I’m learning to accept this new shape. It isn’t perfect. My body is now like a melted chocolate bar you find and the bottom of your bag on a hot day. A bit squishy, a bit messy, far from perfect; but it still (be delicious?) serves its purpose. I’ll always be a bit wider on the bottom than my top unless of course one day I can magically afford breast implants that’ll make me look like a buxom barbie. 

During my pregnancies, I discovered I love for food I’d never had before. This again contributes towards my wobbly figure. I’m learning that just because I CAN eat an entire Dominos Pizza followed by Ben & Jerry’s Birthday Cake ice cream in one sitting – doesn’t mean I absolutely have to. In fact, I should be banned from every dominos pizza in the country; Actually, anywhere that serves pizza.

SIDENOTE: I think the food analogies speak for themselves really in this post… really shows you my new relationship with food.

I’ve got a long journey to go before I reach acceptance. As corny as it sounds, this is my body. I only have one of them. And it’s not ‘destroyed’ it’s just a bit different. It’s the vessel which grew and kept my two babies secure until after their due dates. It nourished them and carried them. So my body’s new shape although not conventionally beautiful did a beautiful thing still. I’ll never look like Kendall Jenner. I think I’m finally on the road to accepting this new, slightly wobbly shape. It’s mine to love. 

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8 thoughts on “My post-baby body: One year on

  1. Your post partum body is better than mine right now! My body and I have always had a complicated relationship and it’s only gotten harder since giving birth. I’m trying to learn to accept mine as well. This is great!

  2. I think this is something that all mom’s deal with at some point. I love how transparent you are about it! Best wishes on your road to acceptance! Lord knows I’m on the same road!

  3. I’ve started to begin to love my ‘mom bod.’ After birthing a baby you realize whats really important and if you can’t get back to pre-pregnancy size at least you have your little loves ?

  4. Girl, I love this. I am on the Big Boob Committee lol so we should join as task forces to empower woman no matter their size lol. My body is slowly but surely coming back to what it was before baby. I need to lose some weight sure, but I am still praying that God will one day bless my stomach so that the extra skin and stretch marks do not look so scary. I realize that the blessing that came from it will be a constant reminder that their is a beautiful story behind what appears not so beautiful.

  5. It’s crazy how much our bodies change after having a baby. Thank you for sharing your story with us. It’s important for us moms to have grace and be accepting of our new bodies. I’m learning that, too.

  6. Our post baby bodies are both something to behold and get adjusted to. They’re squishier, softer, fuller, rounder, and just the right amount of great to hold and cuddle the new baby we’ve birthed. I know it takes some getting used to– I’ve had to get used to it a complete five times!

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